the past was fucked up
the present ain’t too much better
"Hey Harold, I made this cool vest, I think it’ll fit you!"
"Oh neat! *puts on vest* how’s it look?"
"That looks fantastic! Go stand by the hedges, I’ll take a picture!"
"Okay! wait, that’s not a camera, that’s a whAT THE FU—"
"Hey Harold. Hey, Harold? You okay, buddy?"
"HEY JOHNNY, YOU OWE ME A FIVER"
"Hey, what are you doing?"
"Just caSUALLY STICKING MY 2 YEAR OLD CHILD OUT OF A THIRD STOREY WINDOW BECAUSE IT NEEDS SUNLIGHT TO GROW."
"My child is a plant."
"I think the concept of virginity was created by men who thought their penises were so important it changes who a woman is."